I’m good at being vulnerable… but I’m not. Does that make sense? I don’t know. I never know how to bring this up because I’m afraid people will think I’m weird, I don’t think they’ll understand, I’m afraid they’ll think it’s silly. I’m afraid they’ll think I’m trying to sell them something. I’M NOT! But whatever with all of that… So please read this without judgement and get to know my heart through it.
Yesterday I was asked a question
“Why are you here?”
What a fitting day to be asked that question I thought to myself as I contemplated the answer….
I’m here because I never thought I could be, because I always believed a lie, because I failed, because I didn’t show up… I’m here because through all of those truths,
I am here because I can, because I learned the truth, because I succeeded, because I showed up.
Life is tough, but oh, YOU are tougher!
Derek had just deployed. I had no friends. I was alone. I was tired. I was sad.
That’s when I found it.
I was skeptical at first, I don’t normally read “self-help” books but I got started anyway and quickly realized this wasn’t a self-help book. It was full of pictures of kittens and puppies and it was sassy and funny. It highlighted all the reasons why I should be eating real food, then it gave me some exercises and recipes and even laid the recipes out in such a way that I had my grocery list planned out, meal prep planned out, and 4 weeks of meals planned out. I was set! But I was still skeptical, I’d been down this road before, I’d tried the meal plans, and exercises but none of it ever stuck, I never saw any of it through….
But there was something this book had that I hadn’t experienced before…their online community (instagram)… I’m shy and reserved, so I was a little apprehensive to make an account and put myself out there.
But I did. And this is what happened
I discovered how strong I am.
I found a new relationship with food and exercise.
I found my love for running.
I found strength.
I found my love for new fruits and veggies.
I found me.
I found a large group of women who love and support and encourage each other to the ends of the earth… but have never met in real life!
I found that I’m not the only one who is a lover of glitter and mermaids and unicorns and all things magical.
It was a tough year last year while Derek was gone, but God knew what He was doing. It was super fun and exciting to welcome Derek home from his deployment as the new me.
Aside from the changes that you couldn’t see: here are the numbers
in NINE months (Feb8 – Nov 7th)
I lost a total of
Since Derek got home I have maintained (I’ve lost like 2 lbs) I have not set a specific goal as it’s not about the numbers but about being healthy and happy. I’m going to go with the flow, continue my work and see what else my body can do.
And while I lost some numbers, I gained SOO much more! Thank you Fit Girls Guide for all the amazing recipes and for the community that just loves and loves and loves. A huge thank you to all the ladies who have never met me, but yet love me and encourage me and talk me out of buying a box of cookies. And thank you to the family and friends that I did share my journey with, for your enthusiasm, your encouragement, your love, and your support! I love you I love you!
If you’d like to follow along here is my instagram.